Hot Nerd Girl

Blog

  • Top 5 Nerd Holidays

    In addition to all of the traditional and national holidays printed on our calendars every year, there are other, equally as important holidays that deserve recognition.  As nerds, it is up to us to ensure that these glorious tributes and anniversaries get the attention they are due.

    In honor of Towel Day, here is my list of the top 5 nerd holidays.

    5. September 19th – International Talk Like a Pirate Day

    Created back in 1995 by fellow Oregonian’s Ol’ Chumbucket and Cap’n Slappy, International Talk Like a Pirate Day is the day in which we can all…umm, talk like a pirate.  You might be wondering if this is truly a nerd holiday.  I say that only nerds would celebrate and participate in such a day and therefore, it does qualify…kind of like a Ren Faire qualifies (believe me, it does).

    “But HNG, how do I celebrate this holiday?”

    By dressing up like a pirate, talking like a pirate and changing your facebook language settings to “pirate.”  You can also watch pirate movies and read pirate books.  I do not recommend the following activities on Talk Like a Pirate Day:

    thievin’

    pillagin’

    rapin’

    engagin’ in general forms of debauchery unless it is between consenting adults

    You may; however, drink copious amounts of rum providing you don’t get behind the wheel of your pirate ship afterwards.

    4. March 14th – Pi Day

    Mmmmmm….pie……

    Get it? 3.14?  This holiday is definitely geared towards the math nerds and much as I appreciate their mathematical prowess, math has never been a particularly strong point of mine.  On that note, I would like to personally invite Danica McKellar to be my private math tutor.  Note: Pi Day is not to be confused with Pi Approximation Day celebrated on July 22nd (get it?)

    “But HNG, how do I celebrate this holiday?”

    Bake a pie and eat it (personally, my favorite way of celebrating).  You can also memorize as many decimal digits of Pi as you can and recite them for all of your friends (trust me, they will be VERY impressed).  If you’re a true math nerd, you could apply to MIT.  If you get in, they will mail your acceptance letter so that it is delivered on Pi Day (oh math nerds, they’re so funny).

    3. August 12th – PC’s Birthday

    Ahhh, the good ol' days

    The IBM 5150 PC first went on sale on August 12, 1981.  If you’re counting, that means that this year the PC turns 30 (*sniffle* they grow up so fast).  This holiday is for all you computer nerds.  I’m a PC gal myself, but if you happen to be an Apple fan, I suppose you can celebrate Macintosh Computer Day on January 25th.  But since you wouldn’t be able to celebrate if it weren’t for the magical PC, I’m only counting August 12th on this list.  Deal with it.

    “But HNG, how do I celebrate this holiday?”

    By doing some long overdue computer maintenance (you know you need to).  January is technically National Clean Up Your Computer Month, but since August is about halfway through the year, it’s as good a time as any to do a little cleaning up as well.  You could also replace your PC.  I may be a PC gal, but I’m not so stubborn that I can’t admit that PC’s can, umm, be less reliable.  There, I said it.  You will never hear me say it again.  Damn you.

    2. August 29th – Judgment Day

    Good times worth celebrating

    This holiday commemorates the day when Skynet will go online and destroy the vast majority of humanity.  Yay!!!  Why do we celebrate this day?  To remind us all that, while nerds and geeks may rule the world, we must be careful about not abusing our power lest it rise up against us.  I mean, seriously, how many movies have to be made before we realize that maaaaybe cloning people using nanobots and other crazy shit that serves no real viable purpose is probably not the best idea?  Hrrmmm?

    “But HNG, how do I celebrate this holiday?”

    By starting a letter writing campaign to Arnold Schwarzenegger informing him that Terminators don’t age and 64 might be a little too long in the tooth to be playing the same character he first played when he was 37.  Or, you could watch the movies.  Or you could take your kids to a playground and gaze fearfully up at the sky while watching out for a giant orange blast that will set you on fire and shred you apart until finally your bones explode.  Yup, have fun with that.

    1. May 25th – Geek Pride Day AND Towel Day

    Geek Pride Parade

    May 25th should really be a holy day.  Perhaps a feast day for Saint Lucas and Saint Adams.

    May 25th was opening day of the original Star Wars, a day that shall live on forever in geek lore.  The holiday has a Bill of Rights and, even though it’s not meant to be taken seriously, it’s full of bullshit stereotypes so I’ll only print the ones I feel should be included:

    1. The right to be even geekier

    7.   The right to have all the geeky friends that you want

    10. The right to show off your geekiness

    11. The right to take over the world

    May 25th also marks Towel Day, an ode to Douglas Adams, author of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.  It was started in 2001 in response to Adams’ Graduation.  Why towels you ask?  Because….

    “A towel, it says, is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapors; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand-combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (such a mind-bogglingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can’t see it, it can’t see you); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.

    More importantly, a towel has immense psychological value. For some reason, if a strag (strag: non-hitch hiker) discovers that a hitch hiker has his towel with him, he will automatically assume that he is also in possession of a toothbrush, face flannel, soap, tin of biscuits, flask, compass, map, ball of string, gnat spray, wet weather gear, space suit etc., etc. Furthermore, the strag will then happily lend the hitch hiker any of these or a dozen other items that the hitch hiker might accidentally have “lost”. What the strag will think is that any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still knows where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.

    Hence a phrase that has passed into hitchhiking slang, as in “Hey, you sass that hoopy Ford Prefect? There’s a frood who really knows where his towel is.” (Sass: know, be aware of, meet, have sex with; hoopy: really together guy; frood: really amazingly together guy.)”

    That’s why.

    “But HNG, how do I celebrate this holiday?”

    By carrying a towel around with you all day.  If you work in a relaxed enough environment, you can also wear pajamas and a bathrobe.  You can read the book, but don’t bother watching the movie.  If you do, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

    Are you celebrating Towel Day today?  Feel free to take a picture and put it on the facebook page!

    Also, I’m thinking it might be pretty awesome to put together a nerd calendar that features these holidays and more.  Am I forgetting any?  Have one you would like to add?  If so, let me know!

  • Pirates of the Caribbean: it just gets stranger and stranger

    Big wall o' pirates

    I know a lot of people who don’t really care for the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise as a whole. They thought the first one was fun and the 2nd and 3rd ones were convoluted pieces of crap. Therefore, I had a hard time finding someone who would see #4 with me. Luckily I have an awesome Mom who just happened to be visiting this weekend. We both like the films for the most part (although I take issue with parts of At Worlds End). I guess I’m just a sucker for action adventure.

    On Stranger Tides is based on a novel of the same name by Tim Powers. It’s appropriately named since it is, well, a bit strange. Power’s novel prominently features voodoo, something that Disney opted to keep and force (not always successfully) into the world of Pirates of the Caribbean.

    Barbossa's spiffy new duds!

    I’m sure you know the basic plot, that everyone is searching for the legendary fountain of youth. It’s not really clear why everyone (especially Captain Jack Sparrow) is trying to find it. For Blackbeard (Ian McShane), it’s because he’s heard a prophecy about his death and he’s trying to escape his fate. Everyone else wants to find it for no apparent reason. We find out later why Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush) and the Spanish are looking for it but for Jack, it seems to just be something to do.

    As for the fountain, for a secret supposedly taken to the grave by Ponce de Leon, a whole lot of people seem to know all about it. Not just it, but the rather complicated ritual you need to go through to drink from it. By the by, I’ve been to St. Augustine, Florida (PdL was supposedly the first European to set foot in Florida) so I know for a fact that Ponce died and is buried in Cuba and was not left to mummify in a ship perched up on a rock. But whatever, I’m willing to suspend belief a little.

    Fun fact: Ponce de Leon wasn’t looking for the fountain of youth to give him long life…nope, he was more concerned about it curing his impotence (how is one supposed to rape and brutalize the natives if he can’t get it up, right?)

    [youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5AqJww06bw]

    The ritual requires a mermaid’s tear which requires capturing a mermaid which requires sacrificing a whole lot of minions since mermaids apparently cross-bred with vampires somewhere along the line. They’re hot and they sing but Ariel they most certainly are not. My mom was a little disappointed by the viciousness of the mermaids and I can see why. As the daughter of a sailor, I learned that mermaids are not unlike the sirens of Greek mythology. They hypnotize sailors with their beautiful singing and the entranced sailors would walk or dive off of the ship in order to get to them, unfortunately drowning in the process. Or the sailors are nabbed by mermaids who forget that humans can’t breathe underwater and accidentally drown them while trying to show them their sweet underwater digs. Personally, if the mermaids of my youth had been more like these gals, I would have pretended to be one more often. There was a certain degree of “girl power” to these half mermaid-half vampire ladies…at least until one actually got captured and needed to be rescued by a big strong man. Then the whole “girl power” message kind of went right out the window.

    How would you like it if your date went from this…
    …to this! yeesh…

    Ah well…at least I still had a strong woman in Penelope Cruz. She can fight! She can seduce! She can command a ship! The only thing I didn’t really care for was her borderline creepy obsession with her Dad. Speaking of which…Ian McShane was solid as Blackbeard thanks to his icy eyes. I couldn’t buy into him being a master of black magic but I got a kick out of seeing him in a non-western setting. Geoffrey Rush could read the phone book and make it interesting. His frenemy relationship with Jack was in full swing. Sadly, the person who felt most out of place was Jack and I think it’s because they tried to force the character into Jack Shandy’s role in the book. Despite Johnny Depp’s best efforts, the two characters just don’t really mesh. I missed most of the crew members from the Black Pearl, although my favorite of them, Gibbs (Kevin McNally) was there. I was uber excited to see Keith Richards again as Jack’s Daddy but was sorely disappointed by his wooden performance. This is the guy that Depp based Jack’s zaniness on after all.

    In the end, it was a fun and entertaining movie but not one that I necessarily need to see again.

    2.5 out of 5 sci-fives

  • 50th HNG POST – A Tribute to my Mama

    I wanted to do something special for my 50th blog post but I couldn’t think of what would be worthy.  Then it came to me.  The reason I’m here, literally and nerdally (I think I just coined a new word?) is because of my Mom.  She’s the coolest, most awesome Mom ever.  She’s my best friend and confidant.  She has guided me through everything.  She more than deserves to have a milestone post written about her.

    She's really Team Edward but she took one for the team

    A while back I asked my Mother via text message to give me a nerdy topic to write about.  Here’s how the text convo went:

    HNG: “Give me a nerdy topic”

    Mom: “Computers”

    HNG: “Something else”

    Mom: “Driving”

    HNG: “That’s not nerdy lol”

    Mom: “I am”

    Uhhhh…ok…?

    She then proceeded to go to the Apple Store.

    I don’t think she quite understood the question but it did get me thinking.  I am the nerd I am today because of my Mother.

    Since she introduced me to the original Star Trek as a newborn, I can’t deny that it’s true.

    We fight hostile alien species together

    This is the woman who will brave screaming tweens with me to attend a Twilight event even though she’s never had time to read the books (she likes the movies).  She drove for an hour so that I could meet John de Lancie in High School.  She took me to Vegas for the first time and bought me my first Starfleet uniform back when Star Trek: the Experience was brand new and still carried quality uniforms.  She will always go to opening night of any nerdy movie with me.  She let me paint my room dark blue and then didn’t flinch when I put up enough glow-in-the-dark stars and posters to cover up the new paint job.  She’s a real trooper (though not of the starship variety).

    Oh Q, my love for you is omnipotent

    She is roughly the size of an Ewok (5 feet, 85 lbs) but didn’t hesitate to jump kick my brother (ninja style!) when he talked back to her once as a teenager.  She was one of only a few women in the Idaho Forest Service and could chop down trees and fight forest fires alongside the big burly men.

    In the face of tragedy she shows a strength that any superhero would be in awe of.  My Mother is not only my best friend, she’s my hero and, much as I love Bruce Wayne and Peter Parker, they could never top her in my eyes.

    If you think you have a cooler Mom than me, chances are you’re wrong.

    Meet her and then tell me otherwise.

  • I prayed that Priest would be good…

    If it's a staring contest you want Mr. Bettany, bring it on.

    It wasn’t. Wow. What a great way to kick off a review. More detail you ask? Well here ya go…

    To give you a little background, yes, Priest is most certainly a graphic novel adaption as so many sci-fi/fantasy films seem to be these days. It’s set in a world where apparently man and vampire have co-existed forever. And when I mean forever I mean (according to the cartoon that plays out the back story at the beginning) this has literally been going on since man was on horseback, right through up until we created flame throwers. And man somehow was just barely able to fend off vampires this entire time until the “church” was able to create “Priests” who received special training to fight vampires, thus winning the war for humanity.

    [youtube:http://youtu.be/JghQgA2HMX8]

    Don’t worry, I haven’t ruined the movie for you since they explain this in the first five minutes of film. Just know that this setup colored my view of the movie all the way through. And that may sound odd coming from someone who is admittedly on Team Edward, but the fact that guns and flame throwers were no match for vampires but one dude with tiny little crucifix-like throwing daggers could mess them up, was just too much for me.

    Then again, this one guy is Paul Bettany. And I love me some Paul Bettany. He did the same growly/dark/brooding thing he did in  Legion/Da Vinci Code, which is fine. I mean, who has a problem with watching Jeffrey Chaucer kick ass? Not me. But kick ass in 3D? That one was a bit of a stretch. A good 90% of the movie takes place in the dark. Without the multitude of colors that you usually see in a movie, the 3D in it just did not work. The added dimensions get lost in the varying shades of black.

    Maggie Q did the usual animatronic acting/fighting. Cam Gigadent was actually pretty good as the young kid who chases after his love interest. And Karl Urban, you get a pass because you’re Karl Urban and I still need to watch Pathfinder.

    Dental floss… not just for G-strings jokes anymore.

    In all honestly guys, I wanted to like it. Dystopian future ruled by the church? What’s not to like? But the execution was just tiresome and the dialogue was like it was written by a fifth grader. Oh well. At least I had fun taking some of the photos for the poster 🙂

    One of out Five Sci-Fives… (but only cause I love you Paul and Karl).

  • 25 Take Aways: A Battlestar Galactica Wrap Up

    A while back I admitted to being a late bloomer to the greatness that is Battlestar Galactica…cause seriously, I’m waaaaaay too busy to watch every single TV show that comes out, nerdy or not.  Aside from developing an unhealthy addiction to speed in order to eek a few more hours out of my day, my solution was to wait until the entire series came out on DVD and then watch it all in an epic month long marathon.

    Personally, I think I made the right decision on this one.  I don’t know how people waited from week to week to find out what happened next.  Sounds like torture to me.

    I finished my marathon a few weeks ago so I thought it might be fun to do a little wrap up of all things BSG.  Some totally random parting thoughts…

    1. Anyone else think it’s funny that when Lee and Dee got married, their names rhymed?  Even funnier for me was the fact that her name became Dualla Adama.  I don’t know why, but that cracks me up.  Oh wait, Dualla is her last name?  What’s her first name?  Anastasia?  Where the frak did that come from?

    2. Oh Boomer.  Boomer, Boomer, Boomer.  There were times when I really had hope for you and then you would go and frak it all up.  I mean, really, you HAD to beat the shit out of Athena, then bang her husband right in front of her?  Beee-yatch!  I guess you sort of redeemed yourself at the end but I would have shot you in the face too.

    3. Why was Six the only Cylon who got to try out different hair do’s?  I’m sure Eight would have liked to have rocked something other than stringy bangs for once.

    4. I love how Kat went from flashing her naughty bits in D’Anna’s documentary to suddenly having to hide her past from everyone.  Damn girl, you need to get your shit straight.

    5. I’m not sure what this says about me, but I liked Saul way more AFTER he found out he was a Cylon.  Tory?  Never really liked her.

    6. Helo, you went from being a throwaway character to being one of the most important characters on the whole show.  Not really sure how you did that, but I’m very glad you did.  And dude, you’re huge.  What are you, like half giant or something?

    7. I miss Billy, he was such a sweet kid.

    8. So what the frak was Starbuck anyways?  An Angel?  I was obsessed with suns, moons and stars as a kid and used to paint them on EVERYTHING…does that mean I’ll end up like her?

    9. Dude, I don’t care if he’s a Cylon, a vegetable, a hybrid, whatever, when it comes to Anders I would totally hit that.  He was one sexy bitch.  And he waits for you on the other side, isn’t that adorable?

    10. Laura Roslin is my kinda woman, it’s too bad she spent so much time being cancer girl.  I watched someone near and dear to me waste away from that last year, it was hard to watch that again.

    11. The look Tyrol gave Tory when he saw that she had killed Cally was crazy.  When he snapped his head around like that, it was like watching a Borg or a Terminator.  It really brought home the fact that he was a machine.

    12. I love that Badger ends up being the President of the Colonies.

    13. Cally smelled like cabbage?  WTF is in that algae shit anyways?

    14. Hot Dog, I know you’re EJO’s kid and all, but this video is probably the best thing I could find of you from BSG.

    [youtube:http://youtu.be/u2RuHAqvp6s]

    Oh, and you got knocked out by a girl.  An awesome girl.  But a girl nonetheless.

    15. Soooooo….are we all Human-Cylon hybrids descended from Hera?  Cause that was the past right?  Or is it the future?  Does this mean that we can blame the Japanese and their creepy humanoid robots for the near destruction of humanity?

    16. I, too, would like some resurrection technology.  Thanks Helen….uhhh…Mom.

    17. Holy frakking shit Dee.  I never saw that one coming.

    18. Really Helen, you modeled One after your dad and then you did the “swirl” with him?  That is disturbing on so many levels.

    19. TNG Number One = hot.  BSG Number One = not.

    20. Gaeta, you went from being one of my very favorite characters to my least favorite.  The way your storyline ended made me sad.  See? –> 🙁

    21. Tahmoh Penikett – what the hell kind of name is that?  You’re Canadian and your sisters are named Sarah and Stephanie.  I don’t get it.

    22. Baltar – you crazy.

    23. I kind of had a thing for you Lee Adama.  Then Anders came along and you were sort of old news.  Then you ditched the uniform, and while I’ll admit you look pretty spiffy in a suit, it doesn’t compare to the uniform.  Then I found out you tried to have sex with Starbuck while she was engaged to your brother.  Now I kind of think you’re a douche.  A cute douche.

    24. Admiral Adama, I would follow you to the end of the galaxy too.  I’ve learned this about myself.  But you kind of spit when you’re mad.  Or sad.  Or drunk.  It’s a little gross.  But I still heart you.

    25. Humans will never, ever change.  We see native peoples and just assume that they’ll want to procreate with us. Excuse me, Mr. Tribesman? Would you mind whipping it out for us?  We really need to breed.  kthx.

    Looking forward to 17th Precinct!!!

  • Lucky 13: Maxim’s Hot Nerd Women of 2011

    We’ve pretty much established that I appreciate hotness, be it male or female, human or alien.  I only bat for one team but that doesn’t mean I can’t understand the other team’s perspective.

    My 10 Hottest Babes of Sci-Fi post is by far the most read HNG entry I’ve ever written and it’s not exactly a mystery as to why that is.

    Everyone loves hot chicks.

    Duh.

    Maxim just came out with their annual list of the 100 hottest women in the world.  Talk about a tough job.  In the name of research (research I tell you!) I painstakingly went through the entire list.  Three times.  Of the 100 I found 26 that were nerd worthy.  From that 26 I managed to narrow down the list to 13.  At that point I just couldn’t in good conscience narrow it down any further.

    Therefore, I present to you, oh worthy reader, the Lucky 13.

    As a bonus, today happens to be Friday the 13th.  I swear to Gods this was meant to be.

    Note: the order they are presented in was Maxim’s decision, not mine.  So don’t go blaming me if the ones you like are further down the totem pole.

    That is all.

    My #13 – Their #89. Lyndsy Fonseca

    I loved Kick Ass way more than any sane person should.  Like, seriously, I LOVE that movie.  Now she gets to kick some ass of her own on Nikita and it’s about damn time.

    My #12 – Their #80. Danica McKellar

    The definition of smart and sexy.  I hate math but I could watch her do Bertrand’s postulate all night long.

    My #11 – Their #69. Emma Watson

    Another smart and sexy one.  Turns out she’s a lot like Hermione in real life.  Ridikulus!

    My #10 – Their #68. Anna Paquin

    I’m pretty sure she screws vampires for a living.  I can think of worse ways to spend my time.

    My #9 – Their #59. Grace Park

    Can you imagine being surrounded by multiple copies of this woman?  You’d probably die of joygasm.

    My #8 – Their #56. Christina Hendricks

    Saffron, Bridget, Yolanda – it doesn’t matter what you call her, she’s still gonna kick your ass and knock you out with her sweet lady kisses. Somehow I don’t think you’d mind.

    My #7 – Their #53. Ashley Greene

    Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the hottest vampire of them all?  (Hint: Alice is)

    My #6 – Their #42. Emma Stone

    She kills zombies.  That alone warrants a spot on this list.  Soon she’ll be making out with Spider-Man…I’m a little jealous about that one.

    My #5 – Their #37. Zoe Saldana

    Seriously, how many women could look sexy as a 8 ft tall blue alien with a tail?  (Even if that tail does give you awesome orgasms)  Plus, she’s in Star Trek, the greatest sci-fi franchise ever.

    My #4 – Their #15. Olivia Wilde

    Do I sense a naked scene in Cowboys & Aliens?  Dear God, I hope so.

    My #3 – Their #14. Scarlett Johansson

    Two words: Black Widow.  The only good thing to come out of the USSR.

    My #2 – Their #8. Natalie Portman

    She’s an elected Queen and her lover is a god.  It takes one hell of a woman to accomplish all that.

    My #1 – Their #2. Olivia Munn

    She speaks nerd and gets plastered on morning television.  I’m pretty sure she should be my BFF.

    And now for that something special I promised yesterday on Facebook. I took these photos a little while ago but was hesitant to post them. Do you think I should have been? Tell me in the comments.

  • Thor can hammer me anytime

    Holy shit do I love me some Thor. So stop here if you don’t want to read any spoilers…. 😛

    When you grow up with Norwegian heritage there are a few things you learn very early on.  One is how to make lefse with every single female relative you’ve ever had.  Two is that lutefisk MUST have been the inspiration for Klingon cuisine.  Three is that the Gods of Asgard are a source of national pride and woe be unto the person who doesn’t show the proper respect.

    So naturally Thor would be a favorite comic book character of mine.

    Kind of like with Harry Potter I’m always simultaneously nervous and excited when a movie about a character I love makes its way to the big screen.  Sometimes I’m ok when they change the story up and sometimes I’m not.  It all depends on how they do it.

    Thor the movie differs from Thor the comic in several key points but for some reason it didn’t really bother me.  Maybe it’s because Kenneth Branagh was at the helm (hehehe) and the Shakespeare lover in me adores him.  Plus I owe him for reminding me that Thursday is named after Thor (get it? Thor’s Day?)

    [youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JOddp-nlNvQ]

    Chris Hemsworth is charming and, um, impressive as the God of Thunder.  Believable as both an arrogant warrior and an amused outsider, his performance was downright disarming at times.  Let’s just say I wouldn’t mind hitting him with my car or with anything else a few times (cold shower anyone?)  He managed to make wielding Mjolnir, a war hammer that could have looked ridiculous in comparison to more modern weapons, look cool and intimidating.  Mjolnir, a character in its own right, produced a highly satisfying crunch every time it slammed into the face of a frost giant.

    Yes please.

    Thor’s major deviation from the comic book?  His lack of amnesia.  In the comics he doesn’t know that he’s Thor after Odin exiles him to Earth.  After “being” Donald Blake for awhile, he gets a whisper in his ear from Odin and feels compelled to return to a cave in Norway aka the place of his birth (oh yeah, and sorry Rene Russo, but Frigga is not Thor’s mama, Gaea is) where he finds a wooden cane.  Upon striking the cane on a rock, it transforms into Mjolnir and subsequently returns him to his Thor-ian form.  He regains some of his memory but not all.  It takes saving of humanity a few times before he gets all of that back.  Oh yah, and they sort of skipped over the whole part where Thor and Sif are young lovers.

    Natalie Portman is adorable and enchanting as Jane Foster, an astrophysicist studying spatial anomalies in New Mexico when she runs into Thor (literally).  Arrogant as he is, it would be tough not to fall hard and fast for Thor and she is no exception.  What makes her different from most Superhero girlfriends is her humorous way of saying exactly what’s on her mind, even when it’s awkward or poorly timed.  Having been there, done that pretty much every day of my life, I totally understand where she’s coming from.

    She needs to be rescued. Obvi.

    Jane’s major deviation from the comic book?  Wow.  Talk about a promotion!  She went from being a nurse to an astrophysicist!   Much like Lois Lane and any number of comic book ingénues, Jane is involved in a bizarre love triangle with two people who are actually the same person.  In the comics she’s in love with both Dr. Donald Blake and Thor, unaware that they are the same person.  In the movie, the name Donald Blake comes from a supposed ex-boyfriend as opposed to a crippled medical student.

    This was my first exposure to Tom Hiddleston, who plays the silver tongued sorcerer and adopted son of Odin, Loki.  So far I like what I see.  Even knowing ahead of time that everything that comes out of his mouth is part of a devious master plan, I still found myself believing him when he said “damn” after a frost giant provokes Thor into attacking.

    Loki’s major deviation from the comic book?  It’s been more than a few years since I read the comic books but from what I can remember they pretty much got Loki right.  In the comic books it’s a while before Loki sends the Destroyer (the nearly indestructible suit of enchanted armor) after Thor and when he does Thor is able to possess the robot (for lack of a better term) and then turns around and wreaks havoc on Hela of the Underworld…but that’s a whole different story.

    Which one of these is not like the others?

    Sir Anthony Hopkins is regal and imposing as Odin, King of Asgard and guardian of the nine realms.  His poorly timed Odinsleep allows Loki to take the reigns of the kingdom while Thor is exiled.  Oops.  There are few people who could have portrayed Odin and Sir Tony was a fantastic choice.  I don’t remember Erik Selvig from the comics and I’m wondering if the character (played by the brilliant Stellan Skarsgard) is a way of bringing in Eric Masterson way before he’s supposed to be introduced to the story.  Never you mind that Eric with a “c” is an architect whereas Erik with a “k” is an astrophysicist.  I also don’t remember Darcy Lewis being a character in the comic books, but I really got a kick out of Kat Dennings (FYI, it’s pronounced MEE- YOLL-NER not MEW-MEW, but nice try Darcy).  Darcy could have easily gotten lost amongst a cast of larger than life personalities but, to her credit, there was no way Dennings was going to let that happen.  Clark Gregg continued his meddling as S.H.I.E.L.D. agent Coulson, another character that would get lost in the crowd if it weren’t for his impeccable comedic timing.  When Coulson questioned whether the Destroyer was one of Stark’s, I literally laughed out loud.

    Sif, Fandral, Hogun and Volstagg (Jaimie Alexander, Josh Dallas, Tadanobu Asano and Ray Stevenson respectively) are delightful as the lone warrior woman and the Warriors Three, loyal friends and battle comrades of Thor’s.  I’ve always had a soft spot for Sif so I was pleased when Alexander did good by her.  Part of me was hoping they’d show her as a kid with her golden hair.  It would have been a great way to introduce Loki as a trickster when he chopped it off and, when forced to make it grow back, it came in black.  Volstagg shouting “do not mistake my appetite for apathy” was another laugh out loud moment.  The Warriors Three were created for the comic books and are not a part of the original Norse mythology.  Volstagg in particular, was modeled after Shakespeare’s Falstaff, a man who is innately cowardly but boats of his glorious past.  Fandral was inspired by Errol Flynn in his glory days of playing dashing young heroes like Robin Hood.  Originally inspired by the cowboy roles of Charles Bronson, here Hogun is given more of a Samurai persona, though he stills rocks the mace.

    So perty….

    Idris Elba as Heimdall was one of my favorite characters.  Maybe it’s because he reminded me of the oracles in the Neverending Story, maybe it’s because I really dug his eyes.  I don’t know, but I really enjoyed watching him.  It’s a little ironic that Heimdall is portrayed by Elba since in Norse mythology Heimdallr is “the whitest of the gods” but hey, I’m cool with switching it up a bit.  His major deviation from the comic book?  The fact that he’s actually Sif’s brother.

    Colm Feore (really, the best reason to watch The Chronicles of Riddick) got the job of portraying King Laufey of the Frost Giants (Laufey, by the by, is actually a chick in Norse mythology, but whatever).  I can’t figure out if Laufey was all CGI or was a combo of CGI and make up.  A credit to the special effects peeps I suppose.

    Seriously good CGI.

    I really liked the interpretations of the costumes, especially Loki’s after he takes control of Asgard.  It was virtually spot on.  Although I was a little disappointed when Thor got his powers and armor back and his helmet didn’t showed up.  But that’s just me being picky.  Oh, and anyone else notice Hawkeye?

    This movie seriously had the most gorgeous ending credits EVER but the real reason to stay was, of course, another Avenger cock tease featuring Nick Fury.  This time it introduced a Cosmic Cube, which is basically a cube of pure power.  It will be interesting to see how it fits into the Avenger storyline…hopefully differently than the AllSpark did in Transformers.  Loki will obviously be making an appearance in The Avengers which makes me wonder if the plot will revolve around preventing Ragnarok.

    Ok, that’s it.  I’m calling it right here and now.  Ragnarok in The Avengers.  Because really, what would be a better challenge for the team then preventing the Apocalypse?

    Joss, all I ask is that there is a least one scene where no shirts are allowed.  Pretty pretty please with a cherry on top?

    Four out of five Sci-Fives!

  • What Should I Wear?

    I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately and I’ve decided it’s time for another photoshoot. Last time, we went with the classic Princess Leia Gold Bikini cause how could you not? It’s, like I said, a classic. But this time I figured I should get you all into the mix. The first step is to figure out which costume you want to see me in, then we’ll do the whole fundraising shtick like we did last time.

    Now, I’ve culled through my mind all the different options and picked out the five I’d be most comfortable wearing this time around. Take a look, tell me what you think in the comments here or on my Facebook page. Bear in mind though, I will be asking for monetary based support on this as I am not made of money honeys. And please also remember, with my size boobs I’ll probably have to get the larger size. 🙂 I’ll let you know which one I’ve picked next week.

    Happy voting!

    XENA: Warrior Princess – $40 to $80

    Hermoine – $50

    Agito Girl (Final Fantasy) – $30 to $90

    Wonder Woman – $50

    Emma Frost (X-Men) – $80

  • May The Fourth Be With You!

    Happy Star Wars Day everybody!

  • “Dylan Dog Dead……” And that’s it

    Ok, what with all the sci-fi/fantasy movies coming out lately, I’ve been doing a lot of reviews. I don’t want this to turn into strictly a movie review blog, but it’s nice to throw them in on occasion. And as this summer looks to be a pretty big nerd/dork/geek fest for movies (Captain America, Thor, Priest, X-Men First Class, etc etc) I’m going to see if I can slide movie reviews over to Mondays so that Wednesday can be my usual musings on whatever nerdy thing comes to mind. Like mustaches. :{)

    That being said, I’ll kick off my Monday Movie Madness with a review of colossal turd “Dylan Dog: Dead of Night“. [SPOILERS AHEAD]

    This movie had a ton of issues with it. First off, you guys know me. I love a good bit of fantasy. I’m an avid closet Twilight fan which means that whenever there’s a vampire or a werewolf in something, I’m totally willing to give it a shot. But the vampires, werewolves, and zombies kind of looked like they were made by a high school student creating special effects. I will say that the giant Zombie with the mandibles that looked like the cracked out vampires from Blade 2 actually looked really good. But everything else was kind of cut-rate. Which is totally fine for a movie that looked like it had a very, very cheap budget. The whole thing was filmed in Louisiana, which gives huuuuge tax breaks for filming there. If you watched the trailer, you’ll hear him say, “No plan, just bigger guns.” That ‘bigger guns’ moment lasted about 15 seconds and consisted of Dylan (Brandon Routh) walking at the camera shooting different guns. As he walks out of the cameras periphery, you see bodies of all the vampires he’s killed with some kind of flares in their chest or something. Come on guys, you had to go THAT cheap on the special effects that we can’t even see people getting holes blown in their chests, a la Desperado?

    [youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCeLIa02iy0]

    That being said, I can look over bad make-up/special effects when the script is at least fun. I’ve never read any of the Dylan Dog books but the script for this one was just flat out weak. It was the trailer that gave me any measure of hope that it would be good, but it did the classic move of just grabbing any chunk of the movie that worked. And maybe it’s what we’ll call “The Whedon Effect” or perhaps “The Raimi Conundrum,” but when I see a trailer like the one for Dylan Dog I expect to see either more wit/sarcasm (Whedon) or tongue so firmly pressed into cheek you see blood (Raimi). This had neither. There were so many clinched lines that just didn’t work. It all started with Dylan having a gun pointed in his face and then having a discussion with the guy who was pointing the gun about the proper way to threaten people with a gun. Blah. It’s like they were pissing on the future graves of Whedon and Raimi. How dare you sir, how dare you. *slaps with white glove*

    "Hi, I'm a zombie. No really. A zombie." – Sam Huntington (only redeeming thing in this movie)

    But lets not lay all of the blame on the script. There were definitely moments that could have been funny. The problem is that Brandon Routh did nothing with them. Seriously. Nothing. I had high hopes that Mr. Routh could be the making of the next Nathan Fillion or Bruce Campbell. Unfortunately, he just came off as wooden and kind of stiff. When you’re so pretty you make a girl swoon (seriously, when he took his shirt off, I drooled a little) and you aren’t willing to have fun then you’re going to drag all of us kicking and screaming through the movie. Remember when Ash (Bruce) is showing off his BOOMSTICK?

    See that face? He’s into it. That’s HIS boomstick. He’s sold. I never got that from Brandon. I don’t know, maybe I was just too lost in his eyes, those lipid pools of awesome cascading down from the glorious mountains that are his pectorals…… what was I writing about again?….

    hubba hubba

    One Sci-Five out of Five