Hot Nerd Girl

Tag: movie review

  • Super 8 + DBox = DBest movie experience ever

    Alien movies are pretty much universally awesome.  Even the bad ones have something going for them in the form of a grotesque, salivating creature bent on devouring some random buxom blond.  Most of the time though, alien movies are just kick ass.  When making an alien movie, you have two choices.  Make the alien friendly or make them fearsome.  Most of the time they go with fearsome.  JJ Abrams decided he wanted all of the above.

    I would expect nothing less from you JJ.

    Since Super 8 has been out for a couple of weeks now (sorry, went to Iowa, remember?) and I just got around to seeing it last night, this review is less of a review of the movie itself and more about the experience as a whole.

    What made this movie such an experience?

    Well, my nerdy friends, I have four letters for you.  D-Box.  Learn them, remember them, go out and find them at a movie theatre near you. Only for a completely new theatrical experience (and to hang out with Hayden, my friend, and frequent companion in all things nerdy) would I drive for an hour and a half in Los Angeles rush hour traffic.  Let me tell you, it was worth it.  I’m not revealing a whole lot of SPOILERS, but in typical HNG fashion, I always reveal something, so beware.

    You even get cool head flaps like on an airplane

    When the seat rumbles to life it definitely catches you off guard.  The first time it happened I thought I was sitting on my cell phone before I remembered that I was sitting in a specially designed chair programmed to move along with the action in the movie.  If it had been a different movie I may have been turned on by it (haha, j/k…sort of) but luckily aliens with six appendages don’t really do it for me.  At first it only moved when a car would roll by so it would surprise me every time.  But once the real action started I quickly became adapted and decided that I never want to watch a movie while sitting still ever again.  The train crash scene in particular was SPECTACULAR and I sat there with the biggest, goofiest grin plastered on my face while I got jerked around from side-to-side and up-and-down.  Afterwards, I had goose bumps.  Hayden and I kept looking at each other with those “no fucking way!” expressions you get when experiencing something totally epic.

    [youtube:http://youtu.be/iBbEaEUqtnY]

    Strangely, the theatre only had three rows of D-Box seats in it so I’m not sure how the people in the regular seats behind us managed to sit through the movie without being distracted by our rows moving around in front of them.  Maybe it’s less obvious if you’re not sitting in them?  All I know is that the seats are so huge that my feet didn’t touch the floor and you can’t turn and bury your head in your friends shoulder.  That’s right, I was on my own with only my sweater to cover my eyes when Elle Fanning did her super creepy zombie impression (GAH!!!)

    The tickets are more expensive, so heads up about that.  We may or may not have pretended to be Senior citizens when ordering them online…

    I guess I should stop talking about the vibrating chairs and discuss the movie already (even though I know a lot of you have already seen it and chided me for being late to the party 😉 ).  This is one of those movies that has it all.  Humor and horror are somehow woven seamlessly together in ways that don’t feel cheesy or forced in the slightest.  The kids are hysterical.  Charles and Cary in particular.  I’m not gonna lie, it was a little bizarre watching Nan Flanagan play a Susie Homemaker but that was the only time I was pulled out of the story.  Kyle Chandler had some nice moments when he got to play action hero but otherwise I didn’t take much notice of him.  My main focus was always on the kids.  Kids who showed off some extremely impressive acting skillz if I do say so myself.

    [youtube:http://youtu.be/tCRQQCKS7go]

    Is this the ET for the next generation?  No.  ET touched a collective, world-wide nerve that I don’t think can be replicated.  Super 8 has come closest though and really, it’s because of the kids.  The alien is large and scary but that doesn’t keep Joe from making a connection with him (I’m assuming it’s a him?) and helping him get home, sacrificing his most precious possession to do so.

    As Charles would say, “That was mint!”

    Hayden had a strangely alien-filled week and wanted to put in his 2 cents:

    “Due to my (hopefully) healthy obsession with anything extra-terrestrial or UFO related, I’m always up for a great alien invasion flick.  While I honestly didn’t plan on it, I ended up taking in Evolution, Skyline, Battle: Los Angeles, Falling Skies and Super 8 in such an abbreviated time period, it would have given Ellen Ripley nightmares.  Needless to say, after sitting through everything from an atrocity of a so-called movie called Skyline to the superb Super 8 in interactive motion D-Box seats, I feel like I’ve been personally probed in my hind quarters by a group of blind Predators.  While “Alien Week” was fun and educational, I’m ready to change course for awhile so please excuse me while I grab a hemorrhoid pillow and a bag of ice as I throw in a copy of Disney’s Tangled into my Blu-Ray player for the next 27 days.”

    I give the experience as a whole 4.5 out 5 sci-fives!

  • I saw The Green Lantern on the brightest screen, in the blackest theatre

    After a weekend hiatus from writing movie reviews to visit Kirk’s birthplace (oh and go to my cousins wedding), I’m back on the horse with one of the summers most anticipated comic book movies The Green Lantern.

    (Side note: if you were hoping I’d review Super 8 this past Monday, have no fear.  I’m planning to see it at some crazy new theatre with D-Box seats on Wednesday night so, if I do, I’ll put something together for Thursday or Friday.)

    I was stoked to see DC bring Ryan Reynolds’ abs to their comic universe. Wait….. no, I’ll stick with abs 🙂

    Wrong movie, you say? Ask me how much I care.

    As you know, I spend a good amount of my time grading comic book movies on how successful they are with staying true to the content of their origins. The problem this time is that I don’t really know a whole lot about Green Lantern aside from the fact that I live in Sector 2814 (*cue me hanging my head in nerdy shame*).  So this review is going to get filled in with some good ol’ fashioned fun movie judging. Sit back, relax, and see why I thought The Green Lantern was kind of a middling movie.

    SPOILERS AHEAD

    [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oazFv302DIM&w=560&h=349]

    I want to kick this off by saying that I love Ryan Reynolds’ abs… I mean acting. Damn. I’ll fix that I swear. He has boyish good looks, a wry smile and a charming charisma that even you boys can say you like without sounding too gay. IMHO he’s got a kind of Nathan Fillion-esque quality to him. Maybe it’s the water that they give those boys in Canada? Who knows. He pulls off the action sequences quite well, and even the more touching scenes between him and Blake Lively are pretty decent.

    "See what they did with my hair in this scene? It means that while I'm sexy and girly, I can still fly a plane."

    The main problem for me is that Ryan seems to lack a real dark side. Perhaps it’s just his innocence-exuding face but when he uttered the line “Because I’m afraid” I just didn’t buy it. No one else in the theater did either. That might just be him or the fact that I had no idea what he was afraid of. I might have missed it, but he’s a fighter pilot that has no problem launching his jet into the outer reaches of the atmosphere before tumbling back to earth but he’s afraid of… dying? That just seemed odd. And once he overcame his fear it felt very much like “Ok, well, that was nice, now I’m going to kick your ass.” It never had quite the gusto that Christian Bale had in Batman Begins. Uhh, sorry every comic book movie made after 2005, but you sort of have to live up to Christopher Nolan’s genius. Suck it, k? Cause you do.

    Which, let’s be honest, is incredibly difficult to do with this content. These are characters that have a ton of back story that needs to be filled in, from the Lantern Corps, their home planet Oa, and the Guardians that created it, you’ve got a lot that you’re asking the average movie goer to swallow.  Trying to include a giant backstory in a very short period of time can be done very successfully if you dumb it down enough (see: Star Trek 2009) or less successfully if it is hurried through at the beginning (see: Serenity). This one took the later approach and honestly, nerd to nerd, I was just mildly lost. I don’t really know any major Green Lantern fans so there was no one around to help smooth out the rough edges for me. It seemed to just cruise through certain relationships without developing them when I really wish it had.

    Moving on to the special effects…I was fairly impressed with them. Oa was awesome, the Green Lantern suit was amazing (despite what anyone might say). I even enjoyed Blake Lively. I guess what I’m saying is that I wish a bit more time had been spent mainstreaming this movie for audiences. Perhaps I’m wrong, but I felt like a lot of stuff went over people’s heads. Everyone I went with walked out kind of saying “meh.”  It did make me want to spend some time reading more of the Green Lantern comic books though, so it had that going for it.  I have my hopes pinned on the next movie, if they do one. At the very least, I look forward to Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool if that one comes together.

    It’ll have abs in it…right?

  • “Dylan Dog Dead……” And that’s it

    Ok, what with all the sci-fi/fantasy movies coming out lately, I’ve been doing a lot of reviews. I don’t want this to turn into strictly a movie review blog, but it’s nice to throw them in on occasion. And as this summer looks to be a pretty big nerd/dork/geek fest for movies (Captain America, Thor, Priest, X-Men First Class, etc etc) I’m going to see if I can slide movie reviews over to Mondays so that Wednesday can be my usual musings on whatever nerdy thing comes to mind. Like mustaches. :{)

    That being said, I’ll kick off my Monday Movie Madness with a review of colossal turd “Dylan Dog: Dead of Night“. [SPOILERS AHEAD]

    This movie had a ton of issues with it. First off, you guys know me. I love a good bit of fantasy. I’m an avid closet Twilight fan which means that whenever there’s a vampire or a werewolf in something, I’m totally willing to give it a shot. But the vampires, werewolves, and zombies kind of looked like they were made by a high school student creating special effects. I will say that the giant Zombie with the mandibles that looked like the cracked out vampires from Blade 2 actually looked really good. But everything else was kind of cut-rate. Which is totally fine for a movie that looked like it had a very, very cheap budget. The whole thing was filmed in Louisiana, which gives huuuuge tax breaks for filming there. If you watched the trailer, you’ll hear him say, “No plan, just bigger guns.” That ‘bigger guns’ moment lasted about 15 seconds and consisted of Dylan (Brandon Routh) walking at the camera shooting different guns. As he walks out of the cameras periphery, you see bodies of all the vampires he’s killed with some kind of flares in their chest or something. Come on guys, you had to go THAT cheap on the special effects that we can’t even see people getting holes blown in their chests, a la Desperado?

    [youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCeLIa02iy0]

    That being said, I can look over bad make-up/special effects when the script is at least fun. I’ve never read any of the Dylan Dog books but the script for this one was just flat out weak. It was the trailer that gave me any measure of hope that it would be good, but it did the classic move of just grabbing any chunk of the movie that worked. And maybe it’s what we’ll call “The Whedon Effect” or perhaps “The Raimi Conundrum,” but when I see a trailer like the one for Dylan Dog I expect to see either more wit/sarcasm (Whedon) or tongue so firmly pressed into cheek you see blood (Raimi). This had neither. There were so many clinched lines that just didn’t work. It all started with Dylan having a gun pointed in his face and then having a discussion with the guy who was pointing the gun about the proper way to threaten people with a gun. Blah. It’s like they were pissing on the future graves of Whedon and Raimi. How dare you sir, how dare you. *slaps with white glove*

    "Hi, I'm a zombie. No really. A zombie." – Sam Huntington (only redeeming thing in this movie)

    But lets not lay all of the blame on the script. There were definitely moments that could have been funny. The problem is that Brandon Routh did nothing with them. Seriously. Nothing. I had high hopes that Mr. Routh could be the making of the next Nathan Fillion or Bruce Campbell. Unfortunately, he just came off as wooden and kind of stiff. When you’re so pretty you make a girl swoon (seriously, when he took his shirt off, I drooled a little) and you aren’t willing to have fun then you’re going to drag all of us kicking and screaming through the movie. Remember when Ash (Bruce) is showing off his BOOMSTICK?

    See that face? He’s into it. That’s HIS boomstick. He’s sold. I never got that from Brandon. I don’t know, maybe I was just too lost in his eyes, those lipid pools of awesome cascading down from the glorious mountains that are his pectorals…… what was I writing about again?….

    hubba hubba

    One Sci-Five out of Five

  • A “Super” Review

    It’s been a while since I’ve done a movie review (Harry Potter/RED) of anything because quite honestly I’m one busy little hot nerd. But, when I saw the trailer for Super I just knew I had to see it.

    [youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7g74Imj184]

    Super, as I’m sure you all know because you just watched the trailer, is the latest film by James Gunn, the deviant mind that brought us Slither, about a man who has decided to become a super hero. To give just enough back story, it’s very similar to Kick-Ass but with one major difference; its way more f**ked up. Here are the main points that kind of weirded me out, without giving too much away.

    The beginning is very similar to Kick-Ass in terms of story structure. Frank (Rainn Wilson), seemingly had no real prior exposure to super hero’s before watching an episode of the Holy Avenger (Nathan Fillion) as opposed to Kick Ass whose Mom died of a brain embolism or something something SCIENCE! Suddenly, Frank has a bee in his bonnet to stop crime and does so by dressing as the crimson bolt and beating people with a plumbers wrench. He goes out, posting signs telling “Crime” that he’s coming, much like Kick Ass made a…. what was it?…. *Googles Kick-Ass*…. WTF is MySpace? Whatever…. to advertise their badass-e-ness.

    I would fight crime with him any day of the week!

    Both are obviously out of a need to feel something other than they are feeling, which kind of digs at the heart of a lot of the current super hero trend. Super hero’s become hero’s for a lot of different reasons but the most overwhelming is just to feel something different. At least as far as the movies go, some do it to get away from guilt (Spiderman, Batman, Iron Man) while others do it to make the rest of us look like assholes (Superman, Captain America)

    But those are really where the similarities end. While both movies are very, very violent, Super is more visceral in its violence. There are no sweeping ballets of Big Daddy or Hit Girl taking out numerous thugs. It’s mostly just Rainn Wilson beating people with a wrench until the very end where guns finally come into play.

    [youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7NHwsrYlDHE]

    Now Libby (Ellen Page) is where Frank gets all his super hero knowledge. She’s basically like me, filled with nerdy knowledge about comic books and stuff but in a much more demented package. Kind of like a shitzu on steroids this girl does some crazy stuff. And I mean just… weird. She eventually figures out that Frank is the Crimson Bolt and forces him to accept her as his sidekick Boltie. This is the point where the movie moves from kind of violent to blood everywhere.

    Shortly, before the cat fight….

    It’s also the point not where the movie lost me, but kind of overwhelmed me. It kind of turned from watching a super hero movie into watching something more akin to Full Metal Jacket. Everyone kind of starts to lose it and by the end I felt a little…. violated. Not in a good way, but not necessarily in a bad way. Most superhero movies leave you wanting to be like the hero, saving the day and doing some good. But this ending leaves me feeling like even attempting to be a superhero would be a bad idea.

    It’s a very honest ending, that I won’t ruin, that totally falls in line with the spirit of the movie. It’s just that this movie makes me just happy to have what I have and not have to go through what Frank went through; some very serious catharsis.

    Three and a half out of Five sci-fives

     

  • Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows pt1 Review

    Big wall o' Harry

    Every time a new Harry Potter movie comes out I go through the standard stages of movie nerdom.  Excitement, Concern, Extreme Anticipation, Fear, Joygasm.

    An explanation for those not accustomed: Excitement at the prospect of the movie itself and how awesome it’s going to be.  Concern that it’s going to be somehow lacking and not live up to its potential.  Extreme Anticipation for its release in theatres…(when is it coming out already?!? How are they going to handle that part???)  Fear that you are hyping it up too much and it’s going to fall way below your expectations and then you’ll be pissed at yourself for being excited for so long.  Joygasm that the day is finally here and you’re sitting in the seat you reserved over a month ago and ZOMG it’s going to be SO AWESOME.

    Don't be tardy to the party! WHOO HOO!!!

    Thankfully, when it comes to Harry Potter, my fears have so far been unnecessary as each movie seems to get better and better (unless you’re name is Hayden and you have a real hard on for Richard Harris – Ar dheis Dé go raibh a anam).  Much like the books, the movies have gotten darker and more mature as they’ve gone along.  “Deathly Hallows, part 1” even managed to earn itself a PG-13 rating.  Sometimes it’s easy to forget that it’s supposed to be a “kid” movie.

    Because it’s the first of two parts, it’s a little strange to judge the movie on it’s own but there are a few things that I would like to point out.  Depending on if you’ve read the books or not, there may be spoilers here.

    You’ve been warned.

    Hot Nerd Girl and her movie going crew
    1. Anyone who thinks the traveling/camping sequences were drawn out in the movie definitely didn’t read the books.  In the books you forgive JK Rowling because you know something big is coming and these extended sequences are temporary.  I think that David Yates did an excellent job of conveying the feeling of it being drawn out without actually drawing it out.  Bravo.
    2. Just a small quibble but George is supposed to lose his entire ear, not just a sliver of it.  In the books Snape uses the sectumsempra spell introduced in The Half Blood Prince to cut it off in the battle to get Harry out of London.  In the movie they didn’t show it post bloody mess (just wrapped up in gauze in a hilarious Big Brother scene) so maybe they will rectify this in Part 2.
    3. I’m a little sad that Hedwig’s death was altered.  In the book it felt much more operatic.  She was stuck in her cage but the words used to describe her death made it at least a two tissue event.  In the movie she displays bravery by helping out in the battle, but her death warrants only a long sad look from Harry and a small mention in the discussion afterwards.  I was expecting to need Kleenex during that part and was sad that it wasn’t necessary.
    4. Same for Mad Eye Moody.  One of the people I was with (who hasn’t read the books) actually got confused as to whether it was Mad Eye or Mundungus they were talking about.
    5. Way to abbreviate Bill’s werewolf encounter!!  I missed the humorous interaction between Fleur and the Weasley women.  Poor Fleur has really gotten the shaft in the movies.
    6. Where was Harry’s Weasley disguise at the wedding???  It’s true that they can’t have everything in the movies and some subplots need to be cut but we’re talking about the safety of The Chosen One here.  JK disguised him for a reason in the books.
    7. Nagini is awesome.  Whether she’s in creepy old lady skin or indulging her taste for wizard flesh, there’s just no denying she’s kick ass.  I’ve got a thing for snakes though so maybe I’m a little biased.  Her sequences are what had them debating the 3D conversion, I’m sure of it.
    8. The Deathly Hollows sequence was one of the greatest story within a story pieces I have ever seen.  The sheer creativity that went into it totally blew my mind.  I want to watch an entire movie of just that.
    9. Maybe I’m a sadist but I wanted Bellatrix to torture Hermione more.  You’ve got the PG-13 rating, use it!
    10. The Elves got creepier in this movie.  Someone decided that they needed busted veins and capillaries and slightly translucent skin.  Just because computer animation has gotten better doesn’t mean you should change what’s already been established.  Dobby and Kreacher were just kind of freaky looking and, I’m sorry to say, but it distracted me during Dobby’s death…that and the girl in the movie theatre who was crying hysterically…oh yeah, and her friends that were laughing and making fun of her.  Way to ruin the moment everyone.
    11. Friend-who-hasn’t-read-the-books had no idea whose beach house they ended up at.  Readers of the books know it’s Bill and Fleur’s house but they probably should have mentioned that for the movie-only folks.
    12. I had no idea where they were possibly going to end Part 1 and I was VERY interested to see how they handled it.  I was pleasantly surprised and thought it was a fabulous idea to have it end on Voldemort finding the Elder Wand. 

    Ok, so maybe that was more than a few things…and I was actually much more critical than I thought I was going to be.  But you stick me in front of a keyboard and I cease to have control over the direction of my brain.  But I will say this:  I LOVED THIS MOVIE.  I loved it so much that I’ll be seeing it at least two more times in the theatre.  At least.  I love Harry and Ron and Hermione and the actors who portray them.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE Alan Rickman.  The way he chews the dialogue he is given is positively delectable.  I can’t wait for Part 2.  I can’t wait to see how they utilize Neville.  I can’t wait to see Mrs. Weasley kick some ass.  I can’t wait for more Hagrid, he’s my favorite giant among men (aside from The Tall Blog).  I can’t wait to see Friend-who-hasn’t-read-the-books’ reaction to Snape.  I can’t wait for the dramatic climax!

    In case you hadn’t noticed, I’m in the Extreme Anticipation phase.

    5 out of 5 SCI-FIVES!