If you read the blog you know that I come from a military family. This came to me from a family member who was in the military. Their good friend went through some flight training and was surprised to see that his training included a little assistance from Starfleet! Some of the information is sensitive so I’ve changed names and blacked out some of the text (and unfortunately for you, not included some of the pictures – sorry!) but I got permission to share it because I think it’s just so kick ass. Here you go:
I don’t know how many I have told this story to, and they all think I’m full of shit. So now, once and for all, I shall dispel the Bullshit. Before I deployed to ***** in **** for the **************, I had to attend refresher training in the aircraft-make and model specific. When I was in the Level **************, a programming extraordinare, “John Smith” at ********* in Ft. ******* said “OK, so you think your bad ass, huh, Pal?” (jokingly) I said, “Sure, John; show me what ya got” with a smirk. “We can fly upside down and cut grass if you want” He said, “I got the Starship Enterprise and I want you to land on it. I only get this out for the best of the best, you know.” I said, “Bring it on, Big Boy”, in my typical talk first, think later manner. So I did land on it, on the first approach and he was amazed. I was more amazed at the fact that someone had programmed that in! It wasn’t stationary. It was moving at an undisclosed rate at 4000 feet. Thanks Pal 🙂 Here’s the Pics; I knew I had the GD things, I just had to find them 4 years later…I had “John” stop the sim so I could get pictures. The bullshit is over. I am so thankful for “John Smith” at ******** – he was a man among men and probably saved my life about 40 times.
STFU, how awesome is that???
***On a side note: my computer is broken again and I’m having trouble figuring out what the major malfunction is – ugh, so lame – so posts are likely to continue to be sporadic until I can figure this the fuck out or *sigh* get a new computer.
It’s hard to believe that it has been exactly one year since I embarked on this nerdy venture! I didn’t think it would go beyond my friends and family but the blog now has fans all over the world. I’m more than a bit flabbergasted by the whole thing. Hopefully it continues to grow because I’m having way too much fun to stop now!
In honor of Hot Nerd Girl’s one year anniversary, I thought it would be fun to look back at some of the all star blogs from the past year.
MOST POPULAR
The 10 Hottest Babes of Sci-Fi post I wrote back on December 7, 2010 has consistently been the top rated post. This doesn’t surprise me one bit. Hot chicks are pretty much universally loved by all and I’m convinced that the world would be a much more peaceful place if it was run by beautiful women. Unless men started fighting over them….then maybe not so much. Ok, maybe scrap that whole theory. The point is, hot girls with geek cred rule.
MOST SEARCHED ON GOOGLE
The Facepalm Progression was little more than a quick joke meant only for the facebook page when I first introduced it this past February. My Mom didn’t get it so I added the very well-known Picard “facepalm” and “double facepalm” pictures and put the full progression on the blog. It got some chuckles and then one day it exploded in Google land and is now the top source of internet traffic to the blog. Whudda thunk??
MOST POPULAR MOVIE REVIEW
There are a few different ways I could have gauged this but ultimately I went with the one that got the most attention when I posted it in May. It got quite a few comments both on facebook and on the blog and was shared on several other websites. It also happened to be my favorite movie of the year thus far and the one I probably geeked out about the most. It was, of course, my favorite horny dude, Thor. Ye Gods I heart him so much.
BIGGEST SHOCKER
My birthday last February 2nd was full of win! I got all kinds of Star Trek-related goodies but one in particular came as a complete and total shock. One of my earliest posts was written on September 8, 2010 and recounted the time I met Manu Intiraymi at a Star Trek Convention in San Francisco in 2002. Well, Manu found that blog. On my birthday. Seriously. Best. Birthday. Present. Ever. We corresponded via email and agreed I’d get a follow up interview which I have yet to take him up on (gotta get on that!)
PHOTO SHOOTS
The photo shoots are always a hit. I’ve done a lot of mini shoots for various posts with the outtakes ending up on facebook. The three big shoots were Halloween (TOS uniform), Slave Leia, and Lucky 13 (aka Superman undies). I tallied up the votes for the next photo shoot and Xena was the clear winner. I’ve received all the donations for the costume but my move to San Diego put the shoot on hold for a bit. Once I’m (finally!) all settled in, I’ll get that all set up so look for those pictures in the next couple of months!
I mentioned on the facebook page last week that I would be MIA for a few days while I attended my cousin’s wedding in Iowa. I hadn’t planned on doing anything non-wedding related but when my Mom and I found ourselves with a perfectly good Monday and nothing to fill it with there was really only one place we wanted to go.
That’s right kids. Riverside, Iowa. Future birthplace of the one and only James T. Kirk.
So we hopped in the car with my Aunt Lori and drove 2 hours East to a dinky little town with a population of 924. It’s the home of the annual Trek Fest which we missed by 2 weeks (it’s June 24-25). Bummer. Oh well. We got to see all the major landmarks which are all within about 5 blocks of each other (pretty sure the town is only 10 blocks long).
So allow me to give you a tour of the town where the greatest Captain of all time was born and bred. Enjoy.
=/\= <–that’s supposed to be a Star Trek insignia
This is Murphy’s Bar & Grill, the place where Jimmy was conceived. That’s my Mom and Aunt Lori getting excited to see what’s inside.
A hotbed of romance this place
See that little bump on the floor underneath the pool table?
The pool table of loooove
That would be the plaque indicating that this is the very spot where Jimmy’s parents got it on.
See? I told ya!
I helpfully pointed out the parts needed for this conception.
You're welcome for the biology lesson.
We then moved on to where Jimmy was born behind the local barber shop. When you see the flag on the lightpole you’ll know that you’re in the right place.
Tada!
Once behind the barber shop, you are presented with a monument that is eerily gravestone-like.
Nothing creepy about that…
We then proceeded to introduce ourselves to the local print shop owner. He looked Amish but was super awesome. I got into a tribble throwing battle with his grandson. Because that’s what one does when in Riverside, Iowa.
I do have a thing for men in suspenders…
I bought some potholders crocheted by his wife.
Best. Souvenir. Ever.
We then headed to the local ice cream parlor where the walls are signed by TOS cast members. What flavor did we get, you ask? Some delicious concoction called “Oops.”
Wrong hole, but nice try.
After our frosty treat we made our way down to The Voyage Home, the local Star Trek/history museum and gift shop. Outside is parked the infamous USS Riverside and Van Allen shuttle.
Inside the museum is a display donated by the local movie theatre.
Don't be fooled by the empty shelves, they're just rearranging for Trek Fest
And a wooden carving of Jimmy that looks remarkably similar to Han Solo. I felt the need to hold it’s hand. I don’t know why.
I wanted to do something special for my 50th blog post but I couldn’t think of what would be worthy. Then it came to me. The reason I’m here, literally and nerdally (I think I just coined a new word?) is because of my Mom. She’s the coolest, most awesome Mom ever. She’s my best friend and confidant. She has guided me through everything. She more than deserves to have a milestone post written about her.
She's really Team Edward but she took one for the team
A while back I asked my Mother via text message to give me a nerdy topic to write about. Here’s how the text convo went:
HNG: “Give me a nerdy topic”
Mom: “Computers”
HNG: “Something else”
Mom: “Driving”
HNG: “That’s not nerdy lol”
Mom: “I am”
Uhhhh…ok…?
She then proceeded to go to the Apple Store.
I don’t think she quite understood the question but it did get me thinking. I am the nerd I am today because of my Mother.
Since she introduced me to the original Star Trek as a newborn, I can’t deny that it’s true.
We fight hostile alien species together
This is the woman who will brave screaming tweens with me to attend a Twilight event even though she’s never had time to read the books (she likes the movies). She drove for an hour so that I could meet John de Lancie in High School. She took me to Vegas for the first time and bought me my first Starfleet uniform back when Star Trek: the Experience was brand new and still carried quality uniforms. She will always go to opening night of any nerdy movie with me. She let me paint my room dark blue and then didn’t flinch when I put up enough glow-in-the-dark stars and posters to cover up the new paint job. She’s a real trooper (though not of the starship variety).
Oh Q, my love for you is omnipotent
She is roughly the size of an Ewok (5 feet, 85 lbs) but didn’t hesitate to jump kick my brother (ninja style!) when he talked back to her once as a teenager. She was one of only a few women in the Idaho Forest Service and could chop down trees and fight forest fires alongside the big burly men.
In the face of tragedy she shows a strength that any superhero would be in awe of. My Mother is not only my best friend, she’s my hero and, much as I love Bruce Wayne and Peter Parker, they could never top her in my eyes.
If you think you have a cooler Mom than me, chances are you’re wrong.
There comes a time in every man’s life when he has to decide whether or not he wants to sport some facial hair. Trends have come and gone but one style remains a classic.
The mustache.
Some men prefer a classic lady tickler, others are more creatively inclined. The 80’s sparked what I like to call the “pornstache.” Heck, all four of my male parental units have maintained a crumb catcher at some point.
In honor of great mustachioed men, here is my list of the Top 10 ‘staches of Sci-Fi:
10. Guy Fleegman – Galaxy Quest
"Who looks like a tool? I look like a tool. ALL RIGHT!"
We’ll start with the spoof, shall we? Poor Guy, he had a bit part in his favorite sci-fi show and therefore became convinced he was doomed to die a redshirts death after he follows the crew aboard the Thermian’s NSEA Protector in an attempt to defeat the evil alien warlord Sarris. Instead, he helps save the day and becomes Security Chief “Roc” Ingersoll. See what a mustache will do for you kids? It’s like MAGIC.
9. Zed – Zardoz
There are no coincidences…..
Sporting a red monokini and a fu manchu, Sean Connery tests the waters of science fiction with a confusing plotline and a trusty revolver. Supposedly Zed is the perfect man, the result of eugenics experiments (he could pass for Khan’s brother, yah?) created to save mankind. His inspiration? The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. No shit. Don’t get it yet? The God is named Zardoz as in WiZARD of OZ. Yup, pretty much. The best part about Zardoz is what he teaches: “The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life to poison the Earth with a plague of men, as once it was, but the gun shoots death, and purifies the Earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth . . . and kill!” Seriously, you can’t make this shit up.
8. Admiral Adama – Battlestar Galactica
Normally Bill would be higher up in the list of anything and everything but since he only rocked his mustache when Laura Roslin wasn’t there to see it (aka about 3 episodes), he’s back at #8. While his people were slowly migrating to New Caprica and his kid was busy getting fat in the face (but not really anywhere else which was really weird), Bill decided that the best way to alleviate his boredom would be to grow a mustache. If my mission in life were suddenly gone, I’d be tempted to grow one too. As soon as life got back to it’s scary, running from the toasters, normal self, the mustache came off and everyone (and I mean everyone) went back to the look they were sporting a year prior. I think it was their little way of saying “Fuck you New Caprica, we never liked you anyway.”
7. Lt. Hiram Coffey – The Abyss
Why do the movies always make Navy SEALS look like jackasses? I’ve known a few Navy SEALS in my life (including one that was smaller than me and, no joke, sported a mustache) and let me tell you, you have to be a smart and focused son of a bitch to make it in their ranks. Ok, I’ll get off my soapbox now. Lt. Coffey is a Hollywood Navy SEAL trigger-happy jackass who dies trying to kill something (NTI’s) that he doesn’t understand with a warhead despite the fact that everyone around him is telling him to calm the fuck down. His one redeeming quality? A kick ass ‘stache.
6. Prince Barin – Flash Gordon & Neville Sinclair – The Rocketeer
Totally not photoshopped….
Hot damn Timothy Dalton, you really love your fanny duster, don’t you? Timmy gets a double mention for these two beauties.
I’ll start with Flash Gordon. I’m not gonna lie, I heart me some Queen and they did most of the soundtrack for this 1980’s film starring former Marine and Playgirl centerfold Sam J. Jones as a football player who gets rocket propelled into space and has to deal with alien drama in order to save Earth. Like typical boys, Flash and Prince Barin have to fight each other before they realize that they can get more done if they team up. Boys are so dumb sometimes. They git-r-done and Timmy is made King. Yay!
In The Rocketeer Timmy switches sides and plays the bad guy. Neville Sinclair is a dashing actor who just happens to be a Nazi spy. Sporting a much more stylish mustache than his fuehrer, Neville meets his end after escaping a burning Zeppelin on a stolen rocket, and then crashing into the last four letters of the Hollywoodland sign (you always wondered what happened to those last four letters, didn’t you?) The source of his demise? Chewing gum, of course. Take THAT you Nazi bastard!
5. Wikus – District 9
"Excuse me, but do I have something in my eye?"
With a name like Sharlto Copley, you don’t even need a mustache to be cool. But it can’t hurt. Poor Wikus van de Merwe. All he wants to do is impress his Father-in-Law. Instead he gets alien jib sprayed in his face and loses that glorious mustache as he slowly mutates into a prawn. At least he learns how to make flowers out of scrap metal. Always looking on the bright side Wikus, it’s what I like about you. That and your weird South African accent that isn’t quite British and isn’t quite Australian.
4. Wellington Yueh – Dune
Dean Stockwell is a personal favorite of mine having starred in Dune, Quantum Leap, and Battlestar Galactica. For Dune he whipped out his trusty magic marker and drew on a rockin’ mustache. Just for good measure, he threw in a spiffy red dot right smack in the middle of his forehead. Yueh is a Suk doctor who has been trained to obey some kind of crazy futuristic Hippocratic Oath. That is, until his wife gets kidnapped and he throws all of that right out the window, betraying and ultimately destroying his patron. He sort of redeems himself in the end but it’s too little too late.
3. Shepherd Book – Firefly
Some people have issues with Book’s hair while it’s in its natural, gloriously poufy state. However, I’ve yet to hear one complaint about his mustache. Why? Because it’s awesome and even River can’t deny that fact. I have no idea if the tea strainer is required by his religious order or not but I’m pretty sure it could help even the most hardened prostitute find religion. Don’t believe me? Watch “Heart of Gold” and ignore the fact that a madman with a battery-operated ray gun is coming after them. Told you so.
2. Lando Calrissian– Star Wars
Ok, so totally bizarro, but every time I think of Lando Calrissian I think of the song “Rico Suave.” Seriously. What. The. Fuck. I know it’s not rational and yet it happens every time. I think I need electroshock therapy or something. I’m just going to point to this definition of suave over at Urban Dictionary and be done with it. Anyhooters…back to Lando aka friend/traitor/friend to Han Solo. Don’t judge his actions until you’ve got Darth Vader all up in your shiznit. For all we know, Boba Fett threatened to shave off his epic mustache. That, my friends, would have been a tragic facial hair FAIL.
1. Montgomery Scott – Star Trek
Scotty nice mustache!
Scotty may not have grown out his nose neighbor until later than life but he still gets the top spot on my list. Why, you ask? Because it’s my God damn list. And because, above all else, I heart Star Trek and because Jimmy Doohan was arguably the most talented actor in the entire cast. He was the source of many voices, many characterizations, and was even the original inventor of both the Vulcan and Klingon languages. He’s also the only person on this list whose ashes have been shot into space…actually I think he’s the only one who has died…but whatever, the point is, he has earned his spot at #1. And he rules.
Why was this never read to me as a child? (Borrowed form College Humor) http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1811404
This past Friday, HNG fan James posed a seemingly simple and obvious question to me:
Huh.
That is an excellent questions James, and believe it or not, one I’ve never really thought about. Science fiction has been such a constant in my life since I was a small child that I never stopped to think about what my definition of science fiction is.
When you think about it, it’s a pretty broad term that can be applied to just about any story. After all, most humans are cyborgs in one way or another. For example, everyone who wears glasses, has braces or uses a pace maker is technically a cyborg.
So does that mean that every movie with a computer in it can claim to be science fiction?
science fiction (noun):fiction dealing principally with the impact of actual or imagined science on society or individuals or having a scientific factor as an essential orienting component.
By this definition, a movie about a kid who mixes the wrong chemicals in chemistry class and accidentally blows up his classroom could be considered science fiction. After all, his mistake has impacted his society of classmates in a scientific way. Would I consider this science fiction? Probably not.
Science fictionis a genre of fiction dealing with the impact of imagined innovations in science or technology, often in a futuristic setting.
Science fiction differs from fantasy in that it is based in reality. That may sound bizarre but it’s true. We take what we know to be real, say…the internet, and transplant it into an imaginative situation, such as The Matrix, to get a fictional story with some basis in truth.
Computers were a relatively new concept when Gene Roddenberry came up with his idea for a “wagon train to the stars.” While he was in the process of fine tuning his concept for Star Trek, he consulted with every scientist he could get his hands on in order to find out what technology was feasible. 45 years later, cell phones, scanning devices and hyposprays are so integrated into our everyday lives that these so-called “devices of the future” seem antiquated in comparison.
Science fiction can be subtle or glaringly obvious. Take the subject of clones, for example. One on hand, you have The Island, a futuristic clone farm where everyone is forced to wear white and cannot leave the confines of the compound for fear of deadly pathogens. When their organs are needed by their wealthy sponsors, the clones are told that they’ve won a lottery that will allow them to live the rest of their lives on an island free of the toxic air. The protagonists escape and fight for their freedom and right to exist.
At the other end of the spectrum is Never Let Me Go, about a group of cloned children growing up at a boarding school in England. They live relatively normal lives until a teacher lets it slip that they have been cloned for the purpose of organ donation. As adults they are allowed to come and go as they please but they are resigned to their fate. Only Tommy attempts to change his destiny and he does so by creating art. When that fails he accepts his lot in life and “completes” his purpose. These two movies essentially have the exact same concept but they treat the topic with completely different approaches. Are they both science fiction?
I have to say yes. Cloning is a reality but scientists haven’t reached the point (that we know of) of cloning humans which elevates both tales to the realm of science fiction.
Science fiction doesn’t have to be set in the future but it sure helps.
Firefly is essentially a Western, it just happens to be set in the future where spaceships are as common as horses. Take the spaceships away and it ceases to be science fiction. Take the spaceships and aliens out of Star Trek and you have NCIS.
My best attempt at dressing like Malcolm Reynolds from "Firefly". Anyone think they can Photoshop me into a cooler background?
You get the picture.
So to answer your question James, my definition of science fiction is a story that takes a reality and manipulates it through science, technology and imagination to make something completely unique and exceptionally awesome.
And I’ll take it over real life any day.
Now here’s a question for you readers out there. Is there a hard line between science fiction and fantasy? Would something like “Farscape” be considered sci-fi, fantasy or sci-fi/fantasy?
You could copy Ten Forward, duplicate the bar on Tatooine or “cmd-c” any famous nerd bar but those would all just be facsimiles. And while they would be awesome, I thought it would be better if somehow a bar could be created that, while totally being a nerd bar, could just as easily pass as a normal bar. You can order beer, wine or a little Romulan Ale without beating people over the head with patrol Car 718’s night stick.
So here are a few things that I feel would be excellent subtle replacements for items you find in bars all around the world.
Sports Jersey: A lot of bars have jersey’s of famous players on their walls, right? So what kind of jersey would be in a nerd bar? Since we’re going for subtle I’m not sure how good it would be to have a Caprica Buccaneers jersey up there because it just seems too overt. I’m thinking we go with something reeeeeeally obscure. Like a Buck Bokai jersey perhaps? You can all name the episode of DS9 that it’s from right? Ok good 🙂
Weapon Above Fireplace: To replace a normal sword, how about a bat’leth or lightsaber? A shot-gun gets replaced by a clumsy blaster or phaser rifle? Or maybe, to get super cool we go with Duncan McClouds katana! That’s right. I dug so deep I hit Adrian Paul.
Drinks: As I said before, the alcohol would be important. Klingon Blood Wine maybe? Romulan ale? As long as they have Imperial Stormtrooper Stout on tap, I’m in.
Games: Obviously, it being a nerd bar and all, games will be offered to keep busy nerds buried in RPG or sci-fi minutiae. But what games, you ask? Obviously, some good d20’s would be for sale. And much like darts, if you want to borrow the bars dice you gotta leave your license with the bartender. It should also have assorted classic games like Pacman, Load Runner or Joust available. And if you’re really lucky, maybe even Galaga.
from http://inhabitat.com/pacman-dining-table/
Posters: now we’re moving into less subtle territory. A Starship Troopers poster would be way too obvious. But the ‘Firefly’ one below as well as some classics, like ‘Soylent Green’ or ‘Plan 9 from Outer Space’ I feel we could pull off without making normal folk feel weirded out. Especially since the ‘Serenity’ one is in German. Sci-five!
It is universally known that I have the most adorable nephew on the planet. If you were not aware of this, then you need only meet him to realize that I am absolutely correct when I make this declaration.
Now that we’ve established his awesomeness, you can see why I would try to hang out with this little bundle of rad every opportunity I get.
So when my brother discovered that his local museum was doing a Star Trek “where science meets science fiction” exhibition, he immediately texted me and said that we had to go. I had a wedding and its various festivities on Friday night and Saturday so that left us with Sunday.
Brother + nephew + Star Trek = ftw!
Having been to The Experience in Las Vegas many, many, many times and The Tour that made its way around the country a couple years ago, I had high hopes for The Exhibition.
Meh. It was ok.
It turned out to be a small collection of stuff that I’ve already seen only this time it was poorly displayed and poorly labeled (poor Troi and Riker, their wedding picture was toppled over inside a plastic dome and no one could be bothered to fix it). The big draw was supposed to be never before seen items from the latest movie…of which I saw exactly 2 items. What made it fun was seeing Zeke react to it. Turns out the kid has a thing for phasers and women that take pictures of you surrounded by Tribbles. He shows true nerd potential and if I have anything to say about it he will grow up to be a nerd to be reckoned with.
I have no idea why the Enterprise is flying across the bridge
The major bummer? All photographs were banned except for the craptastic ones you had to pay $10 a pop for (see above). Whatever. I’m a rebel. I took some pictures with my iPhone on the sly. My brother; however, is the perfect Marine and refused to take pictures of me. Rules shmules Michael!
We got through the whole thing in about an hour and a half (and that’s with my brother reading every single caption).
If you’re in the Riverside area, this weekend is your last chance to see Star Trek: The Exhibition. A guy that had worked some kind of effects on Star Trek: TNG was there and said he was hoping to get some of the background actors to show up on Saturday. He didn’t seem too enthusiastic that any of them would actually show up though.
I say we all pool our money and get The Experience back open.
I’ve got a major hankering for a Klingon Encounter.
I attended a friend’s birthday party over the weekend that had a 1930’s theme. Next thing I know, I’m in a room full of gorgeously dressed gorgeous people in authentic 1930’s formal attire.
Naturally that got me thinking about time travel.
Time travel via giant donut
Because, really, what nerd brain wouldn’t go straight to Captain Kirk in City on the Edge of Forever or Captain Picard on the holodeck in The Big Goodbye or Vic Fontaine crooning to the crew on any given episode of Deep Space Nine? It’s only natural.
Time travel is a common theme in science fiction. It’s a convenient story line that can take up an entire episode or movie and be self-contained or expanded into a multiple episode story arc. The possibilities are endless and the hardest part is making up some kind of space-time fluctuation to get our heroes to the time period needed.
Back when Gene Roddenberry first envisioned his “wagon train to the stars,” he got together with some of the greatest scientific minds of the time to hash out all things science-based on his show. He wanted to know exactly what could be done and how it could be done that was accurate and feasible. In other words, he asked these scientists to look into the future and dish the dirt.
The result has been the precursor to the cell phone, the hypospray, the modern computer, and so on and so forth. Their predictions were so accurate that NASA named one of its space shuttles Enterprise to acknowledge the fact that Roddenberry and his cohorts were far ahead of their time and deserved to be recognized for it. Every time I read an interview with an astronaut they claim to have been inspired by Star Trek.
Fake astronaut, meet real astronaut. Real astronaut, meet fake astronaut.
But what about their ideas on time travel? Some of the earliest evidence of exploration on the topic comes from the 700’s BCE with the Sanskrit Epic Mahabharata. In it, King Revaita travels to the heavens, meets God, and returns to discover that many years have gone by on Earth since he left and everyone he knows is long dead. The Japanese tale Urashima Taro and Washington Irving’s Rip Van Winkle contain the same basic storyline of a lone traveler leaving and returning to find themselves in the future. Even A Christmas Carol is a study of time travel.
Time travel in science fiction is often a paradox, a confusing mess of “what if’s.” If I step on a butterfly in the past, will I alter human life in the future? If I altered human life in the future, how could I have stepped on the butterfly in the past? It’s a classic chaos theory or “butterfly effect.” I’ve seen wormholes, time dilations, subspace temporal distortions, a transwarp corridor and a temporal casualty loop all used in the name of story telling. But is time travel real?
That'll do Scott Bakula, that'll do.
Time travel does exist, just not in a way that is convenient for us to go back and tell our 20-year-old selves not to get drunk and sleep with so-and-so. According to the theory of relativity, if I board a spaceship and start traveling away from Earth at a relativistic speed and then turn around and come back after a few years, more time would have passed on Earth than did for me on the spaceship. Therefore, technically, I would be traveling into the future. Einstein also theorized that it would be possible to travel into the past using specific types of motion in space. Folds in space time are another popular theory. If space folds in on itself, then why can’t we skip from one fold to another? One of my favorite books, The Last Legends of Earth by A.A. Attanasio goes into this in depth. Ancient magic has been the inspiration for many time travel stories as well. From Claire Randall going through ancient Druid standing stones in Diana Gabaldon’s Outlander, to Hermione’s Time Turner in Harry Potter, the possibilities are endless.
It's true.
Physicists all tend to have their own theories of what is and isn’t possible. Stephen Hawking has been one of the biggest naysayers of most time travel theories. Ironic, since science fiction writers like to use black holes as a time travel source and Hawking is the world’s leading expert on the phenomenon.
If I could go back in time and attempt to change something, I’m not sure that I would. I would love to have prevented some deaths I feel were unnecessary, but who am I to make that decision and change the course of history ala Quantum Leap? Is it even possible to change it? Maybe it would simply result in fate finding a way like in Final Destination. Given the choice, I would much rather travel to the future. I would love to see what the human race is able to accomplish 100, 200, 300 years from now.
There is nothing quite like seeing a hot chick in a hot outfit kicking some alien ass. Maybe it’s the funky hairdos, or the skin tight outfits, or the technobabble being spoken by a pair of ruby red lips. I don’t know, but can you honestly tell me that there’s anything greater? Honestly.
Honestly.
I didn’t think so.
So in honor of these bodacious, bad ass, and brilliant babes (cause brains are important too), here’s my list of the top 10 hottest babes in Sci-Fi.
You’re welcome.
10. Nichelle Nichols
She wasn’t the first sci-fi babe but she’s the earliest one on the list and she has the distinction of having broken down several racial barriers as Uhura. Not only was she a main character on a television show who was black (and a female), but she participated in the first ever inter-racial kiss on television in the Star Trek episode “Plato’s Stepchildren.” Of course, they had to make the kiss forced by aliens to get it past the censors but it was a step in the right direction. When the pressure became too much and she was tempted to quit, none other than Martin Luther King Jr himself convinced her to stay on the show. On a personal note, I’ve met her and she’s AWESOME.
9. Carrie-Anne Moss
She wears skin tight leather while kicking some serious ass. Having worn skin tight leather I can tell you exactly how difficult that is. Her main claim to sci-fi fame is the Matrix trilogy (we’ll stick with the first one, shall we?) It’s a movie that revolutionized film making, CGI, story telling, you name it. Some people dig Neo, I dig Trinity. I even dig her slicked back hair which is not something I usually go for (*cough* Jamie Lee Curtis *cough* True Lies *cough) I can think of a couple of trinities involving Carrie-Anne that I wouldn’t mind being a part of.
8. Linda Hamilton
Holy craparoni Batman, talk about ripped. The then Mrs. Cameron worked out like a maniac to prep for her role in Terminator 2: Judgment Day showing a grit and self-discipline totally befitting her character. Any woman who can break out of a maximum security facility with a broom stick and a hypodermic needle deserves kudos in my book. And a giant underground storage bunker full of weapons? Yes please! Very few women look hot with a cigarette hanging out of their mouths. Linda Hamilton is one of them.
7. Sigourney Weaver
From ripped to Ripley, Sigourney is another bad ass chick with a chip on her shoulder. She may fight aliens instead of robots but, like Sarah Connor, Ellen Ripley keeps coming back for more. She’s also managed to solidify her place in sci-fi history with a couple of other franchises in the form of Ghostbusters and Avatar (personally my favorite character in the movie). After all of that, how could she possibly endear herself to me even more? Oh, I dunno, maybe by starring in one of my very favorite movies ever, GALAXY QUEST. Never give up, never surrender Sigourney. We need you.
6. Famke Janssen
Genre-wise most people automatically think of X-Men when they think of Miss Famke and I know I’m walking a fine line here since technically X-Men is a comic book movie, not a sci-fi movie *semi-colon however comma* she’s got some sci-fi cred of her very own. Ok, yes, she is a Bond girl but I’m not referring to that either. Let’s go back about 18 years and remember a Star Trek: The Next Generation episode called “The Perfect Mate” in which Famke played Kamala, an alien that looks kind of like a Trill before we knew what Trill’s were. Kamala is biologically created to become the perfect mate for the person she bonds with. As in, loves football and beer and giving blowjobs. You name it, she’s on it. The perfect woman. For this role alone she deserves a place on this list.
5. Milla Jovovich
Another ass kicker. God I love a woman who can kick some ass. In The 5th Element, Leeloo wore little more than some first aid tape and a bright orange ‘do. It matched Bruce Willis’ bright orange spandex wife beater and I’m pretty sure he saw that as a sign of fate. I know I would. Resident Evil has zombies in it. I may have mentioned once or twice before that I don’t much care for zombies (stoopid nightmares). I’ve seen the first movie but none of the sequels. Anyone who kills zombies is a-ok with me.
4. Marina Sirtis (see also Gates McFadden, Terry Farrell, Nana Visitor, Jeri Ryan)
The Sexy Sirens of Star Trek television. There are many of them and they are all pertiful. However, we’re going to focus on the utterly divine Deanna Troi for the purposes of this list. Originally introduced wearing a traditional lady’s uniform complete with a short hemline (ala Uhura) it was decided after oh, about 2 episodes, that her best assets were a little higher up on her body. Therefore, she became the one and only Starfleet officer ever permitted to not only ditch the uniform but wear cleavage-tastic outfits in lieu of said uniform. Much as it would inspire the troops, I just can’t see the USMC permitting such a thing. Only for Troi was the rule book thrown out. Plus I’ve heard that she cusses like a sailor with her awesome British accent. LOVE her. On a personal note, my brother married a girl named Troi which automatically knocked him up a few notches in my book. Jealous much? You should be, cause she’s AWESOME.
3. Zoe Saldana
I danced for 15 years, and really, it’s how the “Hot” in “Hot Nerd Girl” got there. So I first fell in love with Miss Zoe when she was in the movie Center Stage about a ballet school in NYC. Since then she has become something of a sci-fi “It Girl” with her roles in the new Star Trek movie (soon to be franchise) and Avatar movie (soon to be franchise). An admitted sci-fi geek, she’s not afraid to challenge herself and take on larger than life roles. Oh, and she’s HAWT. She’s got that going for her.
2. Olivia Wilde
The sci-fi “It Girl” of the not so distant future. Here’s a girl who has yet to be seen on screen in a sci-fi film. All of that will change on December 17th when Tron: Legacy comes out. In a way she’s replacing Cindy Morgan’s Yori with her Quorra and that’s just fine with me. She gets to sport a normal (if slightly Mia Wallace-esque) hairdo instead of a day-glo bald cap which I’m sure she’s pretty dang stoked about. But that’s not all folks. In the works are Cowboys & Aliens with Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford and Now with Amanda Seyfried and Cillian Murphy, both of which look extremely promising. Sci-fi “It Girl” of the future. You heard it here first.
1. Carrie Fisher
If I didn’t put Princess Leia at the top of the list I’m pretty sure there would be a nerd uprising and I would have my HNG status revoked. If there’s anyone on this planet that can pull off a bronze bikini better than Carrie Fisher circa 1983, I have yet to see them. Star Wars is an iconic film, one that I watched over and over and over again growing up. Part of it was the Ewoks (soooo cute!) and part of it was the fact that I would have given my left pinkie toe to be Princess Leia, cinnabon hairdo and all.
And here’s how you can make it happen! A basic Princess Leia costume goes for about $50. If I can get enough people to donate up to that amount, I’ll do a photo shoot and post it on the site! So donate below and let’s get this photo shoot happening!
My Sarah Connor impression…uh…if she were to wear heels…which she would never do…meh.